Special Forces
Special Forces

Special Forces

Regular price $19.00 $0.00
Do your part! The zombie apocalypse is here! Join up and protect what is left of humanity from a gruesome fate! Were you known as a child as “Sneaky Peat”? Have you ever dropped hot into a warzone in the dead of night and assassinated a high-value target or extracted one or more prisoners of war? Are you unafraid in the face of overwhelming threat? You may have what it takes to join the elite operators of what remains of the U.S. armed forces! By going into hot zones and behind horde lines, you could save the lives of survivors or recover valuable supplies helping to ensure humanity survives the Necropocene epoch!

With the zombie apocalypse upon us and only 3 percent of the world population either immune or inoculated, there is no such thing as a civilian in our brave new world. Colloquially being called the Necropocene epoch, as opposed to the Anthropocene, we live in a time changed, where running water and electricity mean you are living in luxury, and threat of the horde is ever-present.

The enemy, hordes of humans that have been infected with an as-of-yet undetermined but very pervasive virus, number in the billions. The virus uses a pathogen vector that targets the body in a series of specific ways resulting in high athletic performance and insanity resulting in constant homicidal behaviors. The horde moves in a seemingly intelligent way, despite each individual having no remaining intelligence.

Called “zombies” by many, others dislike the connotation and refer to the infected as “necrophages”. It is either a highly evolved virus, or an engineered plague. Using forms of bacteria the body’s immune system identifies as beneficial, and thusly leaves unchecked, the virus freely accesses every cell in the human body, changing them in a variety of startling ways. In the muscles, the virus metabolizes metabolic biproducts preventing muscle fatigue, enhances the oxygen absorption rate of muscles and tissue, and somehow augments hemoglobin’s efficiently. Other organs are mutated for various functions such as higher lung capacity, increased bile production (the “spitters”), and sometimes causing simple gigantism.

In the brain, the virus either increases mass and neuron density in certain areas to enhance their effects, such as the Parietal Lobe and Cerebellum enhancing perception and coordination of movement, or atrophies them, such as Wernicke’s Area, the brain’s language comprehension area, rendering the necrophages completely unable to communicate.

Fortunately, due to the selective pathogenicity of the virus’s pathogen vectors, infection is limited to humans. However, animals that in 2034 were genetically spliced with human DNA for medical research are also infected. Though this is a smaller statistical threat isolated to certain areas, it is nonetheless a concern.

For more on infection and known biological and cognitive effects of the virus, consult the CDC publication “Necrophage Properties and Modalities”. For combative and survival information regarding the Necrophage threat, consult the Army handbook, AR-00NEC1-00.

There is hope for the Necropocene. Resistance at a military level in the United States is still a viable option so long as supply lines can last, and new recruits can be found. Men and women of exceptional skill and fortitude are needed! If you have what it takes to be part of the special forces of the remaining military force, join today or show your support with the Special Forces insignia tee!

Soft and comfy with the right amount of stretch, solid color shirts are 100% cotton, and heather color mixes are a poly-cotton blend. This unisex tee is lightweight and flattering for both men and women.

• Tear-away tags
• 100% combed and ring-spun cotton (heather colors contain polyester)
• Fabric weight: 4.2 oz (142 g/m2)
• Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
• Side-seamed

Size guide

Length (inches) 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34
Width (inches) 16 ½ 18 20 22 24 26 28 30